What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
