I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
