Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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