sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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