The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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