she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
