420 ftw
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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