I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
