I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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