He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
