Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
