nut hugger
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
