sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
