Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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