If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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