Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
