my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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