I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
