don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize