I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
