Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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