is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
