I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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