We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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