I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
