Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
