We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
