I need help removing her.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
