Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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