Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
