We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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