The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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