Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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