Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
