People with herpes should wear stickers.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
