susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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