Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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