My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
