its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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