I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
