Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
