the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
