come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
