He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
