they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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