Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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