wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
