I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
