Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
