fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Please, let me fuck your mom
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
