And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
