I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
