Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
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